When Stars and Teams Collide

It is interesting how music will historically define a youth generation and how that music at the time will be considered “devil’s music” or taboo for children to listen. What’s strange are how these musical representations only manifests themselves in roughly thirty year intervals: the jazz age for the Roaring Twenties until Classic Rock stole the show in the late fifties and finally my own hip hop symphony that started in the late eighties and still thriving today.

I’ve only recently become invested in the rap generation but solidified my relationship with this scarlet after Public Enemy’s Chuck D came to Florida State and talked at my school (a class about hip hop’s history and literature may have helped too). He relayed many of hip hop’s threatening problems—record companies run my 55+ white executives, the reliance on misogyny, and the “don’t hate the player, hate the game” narrative that releases execs and rappers from any culpability—but Chuck emphasized that why these problems remained in the game was because there was no more rap collectives, no more teams that could rely upon each other when challenged in a public sphere. In today’s game, there are only stars.

This entire NBA Finals has been touted by sportswriters (myself included) as a true team versus three superstars but this narrative never really manifested itself, until last night. By his own standards, Dirk Nowitzki did not have a great game nor did LeBron James. Everyone has been calling for the rest of the Dallas team to step up because Dirk’s lone star show will not work against the three stars of Miami. Dirk even called out his own teammate Jason Terry for being unclutch in the past games. So when the series looked lost as a decrepit Dirk sat on the bench, towel overhead, wheezing to catch his breath, it was the team of Dallas that responded. Deshawn Stevenson had a surprising 11 points off the bench. Tyson Chandler channeled his inner Moses Malone, finally realizing the lack of bigs on Miami and crashed the boards for 16 rebounds with an astounding nine of those being on the offensive end. Jason Terry backed up his smack talk by sparking the Dallas comeback with 8 points when Dirk was on the bench. When the Dallas lead star was down, his collective team rallied around him when he needed him most.

On the other end, the Miami Heat lost because of the play of one LeBron James. I’m not going to blast James with various Le- derogatory nicknames and this game may hurt his eventual legacy but that’s only because LeBron has enormous expectations  from a crowd that doesn’t want him to live up to them. Stop the derivative comparisons between Jordan, or Magic, or Pippen because truthfully he’s none of those guys. He’s so unique in his talents and skillsets that he deserves to be defined by his own name, LeBron (shocker!). How I judge how much of a star an individual star is in the NBA, is to listen to how both the media and his fellow players will address him. If a player is repeatedly called by his first name, he is a transcendent star (or has a terrible last name like Olajuwon although Hakeem is still a superstar), but if this player is simply a star, they are called by their last (except in Bird’s case who has an awesome last name). How often is LeBron referred to as James, or Kobe referred to as Bryant while their respective teammates are stuck with their last names Bosh and Gasol.

I don’t think we’ll ever get away from hypercriticizing LeBron, mostly because we will always crave more from him. Our appetites will never be satisfied with his legendary Detroit performance or his defensive dominance over Derrick Rose because as soon as he touches that greatness, we start the inevitable comparisons. LeBron will only be appreciated after he leaves the game, sort of how Vincent Van Gogh’s art was only considered masterpieces after his death (In this case LeBron’s death is figurative, not real.).

Although the LeBron legacy questions are unfair, any criticism for James’ performance in last night’s game are completely founded. He looked more exhausted than Dirk at moments. He was content to stand in the corner on timeout, even when he had the shit talking Jason Terry guarding him. However, when a team is based on three players plus whatever role player decides to show up for scoring purposes, a true team will eventually catch up to them. A lot of analysts have said that the beauty of the Miami Heat, is that when one star falls the other two will pick him up. They never had to say this about LeBron, he’s been so consistent for too long. Also, whenever analysts make this point, the Heat star player in question usually has at least a double digit game, LeBron only had 8 points. He scored only one true field goal with his other points including free throws and a dunk. Maybe Jason Terry words are true and maybe there’s some personal matter in his life, but LeBron wasn’t LeBron last night, he was simply James.

The only difference about last night was that Nowitzki had a team pushing him to become Dirk, James only had other stars too ready to capture their own spotlight. 

It All Starts with an Eff You

By all means, what happened last night shouldn’t have happened. It was a perfect storm of poor execution by the Miami Heat, and a seizing of the moment from the Dallas Mavericks. But what makes basketball so fascinating to watch is how much emotion and momentum factor into a game’s outcome, particularly in the last minutes of a game. A lot of people will snidely remark about how little “locker room material” matters in the NFL game and how chippy comments during the week of the Super Bowl truly have no impact on the outcome of the game, but in the NBA, it does.

It all started with Dwayne Wade’s Eff You Three with over seven minutes to go into the game. I remember leading up that point, complaining to my dad about how the Mavericks were giving the Heat the game again and that the series was over. I also commented that the Mavs “looked like pussies” and if Miami is going to continue to drive down their throats on every possession, they should at least be met with a flying elbow, possibly a clothesline, something to convey they weren’t going down without a fight. Miami thrives on turnovers and free throws and the Mavs continued to give them both throughout the night which culminated into Wade’s Three.

Wade ensures that his presence is felt following the three as he stands in front of the Dallas bench for over five seconds with his fist held high in victory. Then Lebron runs over to Wade as he walks back to the bench and starts punching him, presumably telling him how great he was. These guys were acting like their fraternity had just won the intramural flag football game but somehow forgot that there was still over seven minutes to go in the game? Everyone talked of how mature this Miami Heat team is throughout the playoffs but they were more childish at the end of the game than the Thunder kids when they received the same comeback treatment from Dallas. It was similar to when Chicago Bulls forward Carlos Boozer performed the flagrant foul against Lebron James in Game Five of the Easter Conference Finals to make a statement even though they already were with their double digit lead.

Plain and simple, the Heat became cocky. In the play immediately following Wade’s three, Dirk Nowitzki is driving down the lane when Udonis Haslem commits a non-shooting foul. Dirk throws up the ball to act as if he were shooting that play to receive the free throws. As the ball hangs in the air, Wade jumps up and slams the ball to the court emphatically with the cocky posture that had consumed the Heat at this point.

Dallas doesn’t score on their in-bounds possession from the foul and Lebron ambles up the court lethargically and doesn’t perform a basketball move until the shot clock hits ten. Miami repeats this theme with variations of effortless passing throughout the rest of the game usually resulting in a jump shot from outside the paint. From seven minutes onward, the Heat attempted ten field goals with five of them being three point attempts and the only basket they scored was by Mario Chalmers when he was wide open for the three. The Heat only entered the paint three times looking to score at the end of the game with these results:  Lebron drives past the Dallas defenders to a wide open rim but the rim does its job and blocks James on his easy lay-up. James is angry at said rim and attempts to drive to redeem his blunder earlier. He’s met by Tyson Chandler who stops Lebron but receives a seriously questionable foul call, scoring the only two points for the Heat during the Mavs comeback to tie excluding the Chalmers’ three. ESPN shows their typical “stat look at the Big Three of Miami” which reveals that Chris Bosh is having another unsurprising subpar night. Bosh senses the mockery in their voices, calls for the ball, posts up, and turns the ball over losing it out of bounds. Despite their offensive deficiencies, the Steel Curtain like Miami Heat defense should have made some stops, right?

 Everyone made such a tremendous deal over Lebron’s defensive prowess, how he was better and more versatile than anyone before him. This may all be true, but the problems James has, has nothing to do with a lack of talents or skills, both of which he has, but the winning gene that all the greats have. When MJ, Bird, Magic, even Isiah, sensed a victory, they went in for the kill. If that meant lockdown defense, a shot when it mattered most, they were there for the team but Lebron James did nothing. He literally stopped playing defense at the end of the game for whatever reason. On Jason Kidd’s open three, James is standing at the top of the paint and as Kidd receives the ball to shoot, Lebron begins running towards Kidd to close out the three attempt, a basic defensive concept. Then he does the unthinkable, Lebron James stops moving altogether, not wanting to expend unnecessary energy for a game they had already won. I would think James would learn his lesson after one defensive blunder but it continues. When Jason Terry steals the ball from Lebron James and Mario Chalmers, leading the fast break that would tie the game, neither James nor Chalmers chase down the ball. But wait, LeBum isn’t done. Nowitzki gets a great screen from Tyson Chandler and launches the three to take the lead in the game. As Dirk clearly sets up for his shot, LeBron stares at Dirk and doesn’t close out. Inexcusable. To err is human, but to not even try because it probably won’t turn out in your favor? If every guy followed that mantra, nobody would ever get laid.

Then there’s the last play, a single snapshot of how the Mavs made their comeback. Let’s break it down: Jason Kidd holds the ball near midcourt to run down the clock, then the Mavs do the same play they always do in clutch time situations, a pick and roll between Jason Terry and Dirk Nowitzki. Dirk receives the ball and sees Chris Bosh guarding him, even though Udonis Haslem is on the court and has been doing the best job guarding Dirk throughout the series.  Dirk spins left, easily dribbles past Bosh for basket and the win. Keep in mind that Miami had a foul to give, so when Dirk spins away from the basket, Bosh could have fouled him and forced Dallas to take the ball out of bounds with only six to seven seconds left on the clock. It was disastrous.

Just like Dallas gave away Game One, Miami most definitely handed Mavs Game Two. Although this time I think there may be some lingering effects from the comeback, I think the Heat will be able to respond. This comeback only adds more fuel to the fire for Miami Heat critics, but rightfully so. If Miami win the series, this game will become an afterthought, only leading to the inevitable story on Sportscenter when they recap the NBA Finals and they say how the Heat overcame so much for their title. If they lose? Well I guess we’ll have to see about that.

The Awkward Battle of Good versus Evil

Awkward. That’s the word I would use to describe Tuesday night’s Finals game between the Miami Heat and the Dallas Mavericks. Awkward because each team didn’t play like themselves until after Lebron James hit the three to end the third quarter did the Heat look like the Heat. Awkward because the shooters of Dallas were largely ineffective and a large part they stayed in the game for so long last night, was because of their big men; even though these same big men were outrebounded by Lebron James and Dwayne Wade. But mostly, awkward because moving forward, no one understands how this series will end, something to which a Game 1 of the NBA Finals will usually lend some understanding.

It’s in complete contrast to how this series was defined in such a black and white manner. The battle of Good versus Evil (Pop Quiz! Guess who’s who?). The obvious team mentality of Dallas versus the three player team of Miami. Hell, even the teams play different defensive concepts, although Dallas’ zone defense has more to do with hiding their small guards than further separating themselves from Miami’s man-to-man defense.

 Nothing played out the way it should have Tuesday night, but overall I felt like Dallas gave the Miami Heat the game. I’m not trying to take away anything from Miami’s win but will the Heat ever play so poorly at home again for three quarters? No. I’ve never watched a game swing momentum so quickly off of one play but simply for the sake of emphasis, that Lebron three pointer at the end of the third quarter was the most important play of the game. Drama aside, that shot forced Jason Terry and other Dallas veterans to attempt to return to their former selves, which was painful to watch. It’s like Harrison Ford’s career: he was great, athletic, and sexy in his first two franchises Star Wars and Indiana Jones but realized he couldn’t make those movies forever. He focused on the other aspects of what is a great action move; confrontations, over the top romance, engaging dialogue; in a movie like Air Force One and hid his age deficiency. Then he felt pressured into reviving his old form in a sequel to Indiana Jones and at first it was fun to watch but then there was an epiphany along the lines of “this dude is old.”

Both Jason Terry, Peja Stojakovic and Jason Kidd to some extent looked decrepit when trying to keep up with Wade and James. JJ Barea, who was a big reason Dallas swept LA, was pitiful as well but overall the Dallas team didn’t look ready to seize the opportunity handed to them. The soft label that haunted this team during the ’06 Finals is not easily applied here as big men Shawn Marion and Brendan Haywood (weird seeing my own name in a column) willed the team to stay in the ball game for as long as possible, it just wasn’t enough.

I’m not going to lie; I love the Dallas story if they win the NBA Finals, exorcising the demons against the team who didn’t deserve the win five year ago. However, if Lebron is hitting shots like he was Tuesday and the shooters of Dallas continue in their slumps, I’ll be writing how easily the Heat can win not one, not two, not three, but six championships barring injury. The Mavericks may be the last team to ever win a championship with just one star on their team and challenge the notion of team basketball versus a three star team. But there is no such thing as team basketball when the team doesn’t support their star.

Mostly, they need to win because all of America is terrified what will happen if Mark Cuban doesn’t receive his trophy since he turned twelve. (I think the plot would go something like this. Inspired by the new Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 3, Cuban aligns with Russian owner Mikhail Prokhorov to destroy the world of basketball as we know it. Cuban with the help of Prokhorov guts the Dallas roster except Brendan Haywood and forces various trades to acquire players like Ron Artest, Kenyon Martin, Jermaine O’Neal and especially Reggie Evans to induce BasketBrawl Two with the Miami Heat. After convincing Rasheed Wallace out of retirement, Wallace talks trash the whole game to Chris Bosh calling him various names like Raptor, AlienHead, and the Fat Kid on Two and a Half Men. Evans then goes for a repeat performance from his patented Chris Kaman move [he grabbed his junk] on Wade during a rebound, prompting Wade to react into a fight. Artest ignores the fight on the court, jumps into the stands causing terror. ESPN runs the fight on loop for the next three days and create a catchy symbol of BB2: This Time It’s Personal, only the subtitle drops out and the first B flips creating the Big Black symbol. Tell me you wouldn’t enjoy that.)

The Miami Heat aren’t guaranteed winners but if the one advantage Dallas has in their bench doesn’t play up to their capabilities, and Wade and Lebron are hitting their outside shots, the Miami reign will begin earlier than any of us expected.

No More Comparisons

Sometimes, Canadians are plain smarter than Americans. The NHL hands out both a regular season MVP and a playoffs MVP plus the obvious Finals MVP. It silences a lot of pointless arguments about if a player was truly deserving of the MVP distinction after a playoff meltdown. All meaningless arguments would be resolved with the simple addition of an award, plus it’s not like sports has ever been against more awards. Look at college football, they have a freaking best punter award (look it up: it’s the Ray Guy Award). Would any professional basketball fan, player, or executive question the addition of a trophy that has been deserved since the inception of the league? It’s so simple. And then we wouldn’t have to spend a week debating if Derrick Rose deserved the MVP recognition this year; because the answer is yes. And yes. And yes.

MVP voting has always been a fickle matter. There is no rubric for how a voter should cast their vote, which results in a lot of mixed views. Let’s start with “Most Valuable” or which player had the greatest impact on their team, who drives their team to more wins by their overall play and leadership. Realistically, there were three candidates for voting this year: Derrick Rose, Dwight Howard, and Lebron James (with Dirk Nowitzki receiving an honorable mention). If replaced with an average player at their position which team would falter the most? Not the Miami Heat. Although Lebron accounts for their playoff success, Dwayne Wade and Chris Bosh could have carried that team to a four or three seed in the regular season considering how Wade lifted the Heat to a five seed last year by himself. Dwight Howard has a reasonable case because the Magic’s offense is based upon his play. However, it’s hard to gauge the Orlando team holistically because of their mid season trade and how much that boosted the team versus how much the previous players were hurting the team. That being said, the Magic would falter without Howard but former Magic backup Marcin Gortat proved himself to be an adequate replacement when Howard was out of the game. A Gortat-Magic could stumble into a mid seed depending on all the different trades the team would make.

 However, Derrick Rose gets the nod because without him, the Chicago Bulls would struggle to even make it into the playoffs, let alone have regular season success. The Bulls would still have a staunch defense because of head coach Tom Thibodeau’s philosophies but would be an offensive joke without Rose. Who would create the offense, Luol Deng? Not if last night’s performance was any indication as the Bulls desperately needed any shot to fly through the net, Deng could only be found in the corner hoping Derrick Rose made something happened. Carlos Boozer didn’t even play at the end of the game because the head coach has such a lack of trust in him. In terms of value, there was no better player in the regular season this year than Derrick Rose.

Others think MVP means best player in the regular season, and if that’s the definition, then Lebron James should be the MVP. But it should not be the sole basis for a media member’s vote, just like the pure value of a player shouldn’t be the decision for a member vote either (although it should be the foundation of their vote). Another factor to consider would be the media story of the year or looking back, what stands out the most in the regular season. Derrick Rose and the charging Chicago Bulls surmounting the number one seed was the story all year. (Pre season goes to “The Decision” and Miami’s shenanigans and post season goes to young teams collapsing and Dirk’s surge.) Derrick Rose was the MVP of the 2010-11 regular season because of his value and memorable rise to greatness as a point guard, even if he wasn’t the best player on the court at all times. Maybe he wasn’t your MVP and that’s ok, but at least you should understand my argument as to why Rose was mine.

Everyone seems to drop the regular season before the MVP title, even the bitter Lebron James who mentioned Rose by “MVP” in his on court interview with Craig Sager following their Game 4 win. The irony is that Lebron signed with Miami to win championships—which they are on the verge of completing that mission—but James thought he could still hold on to his individual titles. Michael Jordan didn’t receive the MVP award several times because voters became bored with voting for the same player multiple times in a row, a distinct possibility with Lebron this year as he won the last two MVPs. No one question Lebron’s greatness, but the recent comparisons to Jordan are absurd.

Scottie Pippen trumped all when he uttered the blasphemous “"Michael Jordan is probably the greatest scorer to ever play in the game, but I may go as far as to say that LeBron James may be the greatest player to ever play the game because he's so potent offensively that not only can he score at will, but he keeps everybody involved and you have to be on your P's and Q's on defense because no guy on the basketball court is not a threat to score when LeBron James is out there. Not only that, but he's also doing it on the defensive end."

It’s hard to truly compare Jordan to James because Lebron’s career isn’t over but even if we limit it to the first eight years (James is in his eighth year), Jordan is still a better player even though he didn’t play the majority of his second year due to a foot injury But can we stop with the Lebron is suddenly great on defense stance, especially when comparing him to Jordan? Jordan has been on the NBA All-Defense 1^st team since his fourth year (1987-88) and remaining on the team from that point on (remember we’re acting as if MJ’s career ended after his eighth year), Jordan also won NBA Defensive Player of the Year in his fourth year as well. Lebron has only recently entered NBA All-Defense 1^st team in his sixth year and hasn’t touched an NBA Defensive Player of the Year. Jordan had been a great defender earlier than James and stayed that way throughout. However, since Lebron’s impressive shut down of the regular season MVP Derrick Rose is so recent, people forget how good Michael was.

Offensively, Jordan was always better, look at the awards. MJ has been on the All Star team since his rookie year and James started his consecutive All Star streak in his second year. Jordan was the league’s scoring champion since his second year and James has only received the award once in 2008 (his fifth year). Jordan has three MVPs, James two, but maybe that’s why Bron Bron was so upset that he didn’t receive the award this year? Then there is the obvious: championships. Michael has two with the third around the corner and James must win one this year to keep pace.

In every way Michael Jordan has been better than Lebron James up to this point: credentials, championships, even pure eye test, MJ beats Lebron. Now, because LBJ is our modern star and MJ’s former teammate who has been jealous of his prowess and greatness since they began playing with each other, we want to crown Lebron King? Admittedly, Lebron is a better passer than Michael (James- 7.0 assists per game Jordan- 5.6  assists per game) and a slightly better rebounder (James- 7.1 boards per game Jordan -6.0 boards per game) but MJ was better defensively, offensively and was purely a better winner than Lebron. Hell, Jordan’s HOF speech was filled with digs or gripes against various players because he cared that much. Jordan has so many career defining moments that they made a video game about his top ten, if the game was made about Lebron it would be answering the interview questions from Jim Gray correctly at “The Decision” (You’re taking your talents to: A) Cleveland B) South Beach C) Pluto or D) Metropolis) and his epic comeback against the Detroit Pistons and that’s it.

So, please shut your  jealous mouth Scottie Pippen and everyone else who believes LBJ is better than MJ, at least for now. Maybe Lebron can transcend Michael like so many desperately want him to do, but I doubt it. And if Lebron is ever crowned the King, I’m moving to Canada.

Hater While You Were Hating...

Anakin Skywalker: “If you’re not with me, then you’re my enemy.”

Obi-Wan Kenobi: “Only a Sith deals in absolutes.”

Has to be in the top ten of movie quotes of all time, indisputable. At this point, we know Anakin has turned to the dark side to save Padame but this moment crystallized his transformation. We all know what happens next: Obi-Wan defeats Anakin, Anakin turns into Darth Vader but not before his son Luke and daughter Leia are born who will eventually lead the Rebel forces to defeat the Imperial army therefore saving the galaxy (spoiler alert!). Almost all of us have watched at least one Star Wars epic (Episode II doesn’t count) but none of us have learned that fundamental message aforementioned by Obi Wan.

“Only a Sith deals in absolutes.”

As evidenced when I was recently talking to some friends about the botched 1993 draft by the Orlando Magic, who along with me are Magic fans. I was shooting off my mouth (surprisingly) why Chris Webber made so much more sense for the Magic after they lucked into the No. 1 pick that year. Webber was one of the few breeds of forward who was as stellar at passing as he was shooting, great defender down low (Hardaway was a sieve), and had more raw talent than Hardaway had talent. Instead, Orlando traded back to the No. 3 pick because they were so impressed with Hardaway’s one workout that no one else saw. By drafting Chris Webber, the Magic had a greater chance of convincing Shaq to stay—O’Neal and Hardaway had a falling out that convinced Shaq to leave—kept  Scott Skiles to run point in 1994 and possibly sign a role player like Steve Kerr who was fundamental in the Bulls’ second threepeat. Don’t forget Orlando also drafted Darrel Armstrong in 1994 who proved to be a valuable asset and fan favorite in Orlando. The Magic could have had a starting five of Skiles, Armstrong, Kerr, C-Webb, and Shaq for the next six to seven years at least and fill in various role players and low level veterans throughout to patch the holes of the team. That sounds a lot better than a failed 1995 Finals performance, Shaq leaving, watching Hardaway flame out, and Orlando basketball entering obscurity until they drafted Dwight Howard.

No Magic fan can convince me that they would rather have the what-if starting five instead of the one year of greatness Orlando had. However, my Magic friends were telling me how crucial Penny was to the ’95 run (true) and at least he had a decent career post-Shaq. Since when has basketball been about just being able to compete? It seemed they were all too wary of criticizing their team and being seen as a hater. This hater notion has to be the most frustrating inanity of sports fandom.

Either I’m a die-hard fanatic who loves every financial and athletic move my team makes or I’m an annoying hater who isn’t a true fan. Which leads us to Lebron James, the most polarizing athlete in professional sports. I like Lebron, he’s distanced himself as the best player in the NBA right now. However, I, along with 85% of the country, hated The Decision. I distaste the Miami Heat’s basketball version of Two and a Half Men (when is Bosh being replaced by Ashton?) and how they have a good chance of winning the championship destroying any concept of team I’ve ever known. Despite all that, I can’t deny how great Dwayne Wade and Lebron James have been this postseason. Any labels of choke artist have been stripped from Lebron as we watched him crush the Celtics’ dreams in Games 4 and 5 scoring the last four points to force overtime, the go ahead basket for the win to start overtime, and score the last 10 points of the game of Game 5 to close out the series. He then rallied against Chicago putting the team on his back again scoring only the last seven points this time. Watching both James and Wade kill themselves on offense and defense with Wade clearly rattling both Ray Allen’s and Derrick Rose’s shooting performances in the respective series has been an absolute treat. The problem is no one can separate The Decision between their decision if they like the player or not. Criticizing is fair and should happen like Orlando’s botched draft in 1993 but bashing a player’s talents, calling him overrated simply because he was selfish is the definition of a true hater. No more hating, I thought we dealt with that a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away.

Clutch, Closers, and Kleptomaniacs

One of the most valued characteristics of modern sports is the clutch ability. Can he hit the game winning 3, lead the 2 minute drive, get 3 outs in the bottom of the 9^th? We as fans ask a ludicrous consistency from our players, expecting Peyton Manning to always lead the Colts down the field, telling our friends “Ray Allen always makes this shot,” when in reality they don’t. The NBA Playoffs have been a microcosm study of our fascination with closers in sports and has led to a humanizing of our favorite players, our heroes. Even if we don’t want to admit it.

Let’s define the difference between being clutch and what a closer is in NBA terms. Being clutch is the ability to hit the game winning shot when the team has the last possession to win or tie the game. A closer is defined by the player that the offense runs through in the last 5 minutes of a game. For example, even though Derek Fischer is the point guard for the Lakers, Kobe Bryant begins running the plays in big games with five minutes left. Speaking of which, wasn’t Kobe Bryant “the man” when it came to being clutch and a closer, not this year. Most of the time, closers are seen as an offensive threat but the defensive capabilities of a team and the closer on that team should be considered as well. The Lakers were leading by seven points with five minutes left in both Games 1 and 3 against the Mavericks but they lost both games. They ceased to play defense and those fade away jumpers that Kobe used to always swish through the net, started hitting the rim. Most will point to the Lakers’ porous defense for their playoff debauchery but Kobe did miss that three in Game 1 and he did become ineffective as the Laker closer in Games 2 and 3. This shouldn’t be a surprise though, examine the Lakers’ last regular season game and watch Kobe Bryant miss shot after shot with five minutes left in the 4^th quarter but then switch into classic Kobe by nailing the game tying shot in a fall away manner. Eventually the shots stop falling for the closers in the NBA and instead of reasoning to realistic causes like age, stellar defense by the opposing team, or even a poor call, they are thrown asunder. However, for 25 other teams in the NBA, they want Kobe on their team taking that shot every time.

As much as people tout Kobe Bryant as Mr. Clutch, he also holds the record for most missed game winning shots. Before the Lakers won their last two championships, Bryant was tied for most game winning shots in the playoffs (4 for 8 before 2009 Playoffs) by the man who is being criticized for his late game heroics: Lebron James. Before Game 5 of the Celtics-Heat series, Lebron has been atrocious at clutching a victory as a member of the Miami Heat. Some will tell you that the last play usually comes down to the closer of the team creating his own shot and winning the game. Part of that is true, but how often do teams with the last shot come out of a time out before their last possession.  I would argue at least 75% of the time. It would then make sense for that team to have some sort of play to execute for the last possession, even if it is creating separation between the defense and the closer. Yet, the Miami Heat have been a work in progress all year, every part of their game has struggled, so when they stumble in executing the final play of the game, why would it not be expected for them to falter in that area of play? Don’t get me wrong, Lebron James should be partly blamed for his late game woes but let’s not solely blame him for his team’s late game tribulations.

That being said, when he finally produced in Game 5 against the Celtics scoring 10 points by himself, he shouldn’t have acted as if he had won the Olympics all over again by kneeling on the ground, overcome by emotion. Give America a break. The Heat are merely halfway through winning the championship and after defeating the team that hasn’t won the championship the past two years, yet they act like their high school girlfriends finally gave up their v-card. Forget about the Chicago Bulls looming around the corner whose matchups are terrible for the Heat (Chicago’s Rose and Noah are far superior than Miami’s Bibby and Anthony. Carlos Boozer vs. Chris Bosh is a toss-up depending on who feels like playing that night) or that they still have to make the freaking NBA Finals.

The Russel Westbrook-Kevin Durant argument that has been constructed within the playoffs particularly against the Grizzlies shouldn’t be an argument. Russell Westbrook has a better matchup than Kevin Durant but if my point has somehow been lost here it is: give your best player the freaking ball. Stats become meaningless within the last shot of the game, if they meant something, Greivis Vasquez (whose first name clearly doesn’t know the rule I before E except after C) should take the final shot for the Memphis Grizzlies. No matter if they are on a cold streak or are finally showing their age, they are still your best player. Let’s all stop being such kleptomaniacs. Everyone knows who the best player is on their respective team and who they want shooting in the final possession; just as everyone outside of the Miami Heat and their fans knows their win was miniscule if they fail hereafter. Then again, maybe I’m the klepto because I care about sports this much. 

Not your Typical NBA Playoffs Preview

When it comes to big events in sports such as the NBA playoffs, every sportswriter in America wants to give their input of who will win but this year that doesn’t make sense. The NBA playoffs are the most open they have been in a long time which is a good thing; we could have a playoffs better than 1993. Since I don’t want to give you the obligatory Chicago Bulls- Los Angelos Lakers pick that every sports pundit in America will, I want to share a unique fact, matchup, or observation from each opening series that most people ignore or just don’t think is important. Let’s see if you do.

1 Chicago Bulls vs. 8 Indiana Pacers

Funny thing about Derrick Rose, the clear NBA MVP, is that he is terrified of clowns. Yes, the man who is devoid of emotion during his interviews; cringes in fear if he sees a round, red nose or a water-squirting flower. Apparently some Pacers fans heard about this and want to dress as clowns for Game 3 of the series, which if they do is can’t-miss TV. In fact, it’s the only reason why America will watch any of this series.

2 Miami Heat vs. 7 Philadelphia 76ers

Experts in running form from Miami decided to study the Miami Heat players and their individual running posture. They discovered that Dwayne Wade has the worst running form possible while his teammate Lebron James runs with perfect posture. When Wade runs, he extends his leg too far, landing directly on heels, all while locking his knee. Wade also has each exact physical problem that runners of this nature are predicted to have. It will probably have little outcome on this series but if he does injure himself, and the half-star Chris Bosh is having one of his “few” bad games, the Heat  could have an early exit in this playoffs.

3 Boston Celtics vs. 6 New York Knicks

The two teams that made significant trades at the trade deadline that have produced questionable outcomes. The Boston Celtics are the only team to be considered favorites in the playoffs before a trade and now are worried about escaping the first round. How do you make that Perkins trade? Especially for Nenad Kristic and Jeff Green, neither able to find a role in this team as of yet. There is no way that Kristic and Green were the best offers on the table when Kendrick Perkins was being shopped around. Danny Ainge: “Hey do you want a center who will radically change your team’s defensive identity, creating a toughness that is seriously lacking in this league?” Apparently not. The Knicks’ problem isn’t their players, it’s their coach. Mike D’Antoni coaches one style in the NBA, even when he receives one of the most dominant half court players in the game in Carmelo Anthony, he chooses wants to run his players up and down the court. Unless the Knicks magically advance to the Conference Finals, expect D’Antoni to be fired next season.

4 Orlando Magic vs. 5 Atlanta Hawks

The Hawks’ Jason Collins has been touted as the Dwight Howard and Shaquille O’Neal killer because for reasons unknown, he really bothers those players. It will be the only time that a game may be decided by Jason Collins in his entire career but what I find more interesting is how much Shaq and Dwight love to associate with each other.

Shaq: “I’m Superman”

Dwight: “Did you see me wear that cape and dunk? I’m Superman!”

Shaq: “Yeah I believe the goatee gives me a different look. It gives me that intimidating look I was going for.”

 Dwight: “Don’t you love my half lip mustache. I almost cut my lip every morning shaving but I just look so good.”

 Dwight: “I don’t know why but Jason Collins really bothered me tonight, I will still own the matchup during the playoffs though.

Shaq: “Everyone says Jason Collins bothers Dwight, I hope I don’t have to play him, he could be a career killer.”

No Shaq, that would be Kazaam.

1 San Antonio Spurs vs. Memphis Grizzlies

Let’s be honest, this has to be the least intriguing matchup in the first round. The Spurs have been playing the same team basketball in the least exciting way forever. For that reason Tim Duncan has been vastly underrated by most, generally not included in the top 10 players of the NBA even though he is an obvious choice. When you’re watching the Spurs sweep a team that lack any type of team identity, appreciate how consistent the Spurs have been, even if it is slightly boring.

2 Los Angelos Lakers vs. 7 New Orleans Hornets

An observation that most have ignored or refused to speak of is that Kobe Bryant has quietly been on the decline this season. The final regular season game was the perfect example: within the last four minutes of the game, the Sacramento Kings were mounting a comeback. Kobe attempted to put the team on his back and ended up missing five shots in a row as the Kings stole the lead from the Lakers. However, with five seconds left, Kobe shoots a ridiculous three and forces the game into overtime. He rides the momentum of his three in overtime to win the game and is touted as the hero, again. During highlights, ESPN forgets to mention Kobe’s cold streak and the American public never know that Kobe almost lost the game for the Lakers. Kobe is still the guy with the ball in his hand with a minute left, but don’t be shocked if he starts trending towards missing those clutch shots instead of making them.

3 Dallas Mavericks vs. 6 Portland Trailblazers

When everyone predicts an upset is it even an upset anymore? The Dallas Mavericks are the most underachieving team in sports but nobody is even giving them a chance. It always seems when everyone jumps on an upset—see Butler in 2011 March Madness Final—the dominant team usually wins. It almost makes me nervous to not predict the Trailblazers upsetting the Mavericks. Almost. When every bottom seeded team in a conference wants to play your team in the first round of the playoffs, that’s a bad sign. The Trailblazers have too many bodies to throw at Dirk he won’t be as significant and the Trailblazers arguably have four of the top five players in this series, it’s a no brainer. Portland in 6.

4 Oklahoma City Thunder vs. 5 Denver Nuggets

I believe that the Thunder are going to win it all but I’m ok if they don’t and here’s why. If the Nuggets win the Finals (which won’t happen), Disney is  going to have to make a sports movie about them. It has the perfect set up. “A team falls short the year before because their coach had cancer and came back this year with high hopes. Their two star players left them so they could lose on a different team for more money. After their departure, the team banded together winning more games than with their stars. They fought through better teams throughout the postseason and proved that teamwork always comes first. Gold Rush: the true story of how a small team overcame so much.”

If only.